St PATRICK JOINS SCRUTINY PANEL

Call me Deputy Sean Murphy…

Yesterday the very heavily controlled Scrutiny Hearings were concerned with the current Population and Migration controlling policies of the States.

It being the day before St Patrick’s Day there was a large degree of Irish tinking in the air and Deputy Sean actually was so carried away that, following Constable Murphy of Gr’Oville, he introduced himself as Deputy Sean Murphy. It was the highlight of some dismal proceedings.

Total control is planned and as is so usual, it was the immigrant element supporting the latest oppressions against outsiders with the greatest vigour – although in one unsteady moment Constable Murphy did express concerns for Human Rights! He was probably a bit battle weary by then and confided later that he was, as always, in his Jersey way, just concerned for the underdog.

In fact, Sean’s little slip of the tongue revealed just how pathetically frail the whole new controlling plan of the States could be. It’s all built around an absurd POPULATION REGISTER which will be in force from 31 December this year – and this will have ALL the names and address and places of work of everybody in the Island on it besides much much more information to be gleaned from the latest Census, Police, GPs, Social Security, Housing, Treasury (aka Income Tax), Health, Education, Planning, Parish, Utilities departments etc.

Of course, we will ALL have to carry a card  - an ID card by any other name - just as people did during those dark years in the 1940s O’ccupation. Even then though they didn’t have a control system like that now being prepared – O’pressive! – you ain’t seen nothing like this since feudalism!!!

Strangely though, although then it was the Prussians with strange names seeking to control things then – now WE are seeking to control people with funny names from all over the world - but especially the old Soviet bloc countries (remember them?)- and we all know what impossibly funny names they tend to have. All consonants and no vowels Carole – and impossible to pronounce – or enter into a computer DATA file accurately.

Now there’s the rub. ACCURACY – never mind Murphy’s Law on the underdog for the moment.

Let me digress slightly. Back in the days of  Bailiff Sir Frank EREAUT (now there’s a name to conjure with, spell or pronounce) yours truly was waiting in the Friday afternoon court to present my Representation against the then Housing Committee President HENDRICK  VANDERVLIET (no comment necessary) about the oppressive nature of the Housing Law and Regulations.

Sir Frank soon threw me out as can be imagined but whilst I was waiting for my 30 seconds of fame, an unfortunate Portuguese man appeared to answer to living illegally, without qualifications in a flat. Yet his extraordinary defence was that the Housing Department had actually issued him with a permission to occupy – having mistaken him for somebody with a similar name….you are probably catching my drift….but there’s more as the Irish comedian with the green wellies used to say….because Sir Frank ruled that since he had been granted the permit, he was in legal and proper occupation and could not be removed or prosecuted.

Well, just imagine, if all the names of dwellings and their occupiers, or employers and their workers are to be accurately entered into some immense DATA file by mere human beings and the very right to breathe the air of this Bailiwick depends upon the information being correct and up to date…

Doesn’t bear thinking about does it – especially since every government department will be using the DATA to discover people not paying tax, or social security or creating and letting a spare bedroom without permission or sleeping on somebody’s floor, or sharing a bed with somebody else’s wife or husband…so many people will have reasons for not wanting to be on the Register at all…

The star of yesterday’s hearing was Duncan Gib’O. He is the numbers man. He is a scientist producing the arithmetical scenario that induces governments to take draconian actions just such as this whole farce. It does not really matter whether counting potatoes or people because he is entirely independent and in love with stats. Names and address and places of work are not important in his growing department – he is not a peoples’ person but exudes a sort of Prussian air of technical superiority which sends the likes of Senator Ferguson into a swoon….

So that is enough for now. Next time perhaps we will consider in more detail just why these people are wasting their time in trying to control Jersey’s population whereas they only really want yet more ECONOMIC GROWTH and in this capitalist Island that demands more and more people….

In the meantime, consider the traditional Irish role as an exporter of people and the currently collapsed Irish home economy and how all such small Islands are so vulnerable…and try to enjoy St Patrick’s Day.